Although it is the wish of every spouse to enjoy a close, loving relationship with his or her spouse, some married people find that they don’t get the kind of love and attention they want from their spouses.
How do you cope with neglect in marriage, if your spouse does not show you the kind of love you desire?
1. Learn Something New
Learn how to do yoga, learn how to dance a Ghanaian dance, start attending classes which teach African languages, start wearing African clothes instead of the clothes you are used to, or learn how to cook an exotic meal.
By doing these things, you will feel a sense of accomplishment which will boost your self-esteem and help you to get your self-worth back. Consequently, you will feel good about life and you will be at peace with yourself, which will help you to enjoy every day as a gift from God.
Additionally, doing something new will make you excited about life again, which will help to revive your spirit, you will feel happy and cheerful, and your spouse will notice it and may feel attracted to you again and want to spend more time with you.
2. Exercise Regularly
According to the Harvard Medical School, exercising releases brain chemicals called endorphins, which are natural painkillers, into the body. These chemicals have a calming effect on the nervous system and so help a person to feel relaxed.
So, when you make it a habit to exercise often, you will find it easier to relax and feel calm, which will prevent anxiety and depression.
Therefore, every morning, walk briskly for 30 minutes before you go to work. Additionally, run a distance of 5 miles, ride your bicycle for 30 minutes, swim with your close friends, jump a rope for 30 minutes, do 50 push-ups, or dance to your favorite music for one hour and you will feel happy about life.
3. Spend A Lot Of Time With Your Pet
A pet can be an angel when you feel lonely and neglected in a marriage. The pet will give you unconditional love and attention, which will remind you that even if your spouse does not care about you, it cares about you. That will help you to feel loved and, as a result, you will feel happy.
Furthermore, a dog, cat, horse, rabbit, parrot, or horse will distract you so that you will not worry too much about how your spouse is treating you.
Moreover, research shows that touching animals causes the release of serotonin and dopamine, two hormones that help one to feel good, into the body. Touching your pet will make you feel happy and that will help you to relax and enjoy the birds singing, the sun going down in the evening, or the smell of flowers.
Additionally, touching your pet will cause your brain to release oxytocin, a hormone which lowers blood pressure and heart rates. Consequently, you will feel less anxious and nervous and that will help you to deal effectively with the stress of being neglected by your spouse.
Develop your relationship with God and talk to Him often through prayer. This will help you to manage your negative emotions better-a study conducted in the University of Wisconsin-Madison has revealed that people who choose to pray in hard times find comfort and are able to manage their negative emotions-anger, sadness, anxiety-effectively.
When you pour out your heart knowing that at least someone, God, is listening to you, it will help you to experience the release of emotional pain so that you will feel better.
Additionally, praying will also remind you that God loves you and cares about your concerns, which will help to raise your self-esteem again.
Furthermore, praying will help to distract you so that you will stop worrying about your neglect and your loneliness and that can give peace to your soul and your mind.
To cope with neglect in marriage, learn how to do something new, exercise every day, draw closer to your pet, and seek solace with the Heavenly Father, and you will find a new sense of purpose in life which will help you to keep on enjoying life.